Metallicar And Pie
by Heart Torn Out
Summary: This is what would happen if my brothers and I met the characters not actors of Supernatural. Its complete crack and swears, but...I think its pretty awesome. And so true. Because that's just the way I roll. And rock. Rock and Roll. Any takers? Destiel!


**OK, so this would totally happen if i met Sam and Dean and Cas, the characters. I asked my brothers if they wanted to be in it and they said yes. So.**

**Its pretty much crack guys, with a lot of FanGirl slang. So go to SuperWiki if you need any of it defined. **

**Enjoy.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything except me and my brothers (you guys heard me, i OWN you!). So don't sue cuz i'm broke.**

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**A Parody**

"Excuse me?" Dean said, glancing over to Sam.

"AHHH!" the girl in front of them yelled, making both brothers jump back in fright. She was of average height and looked very average. But she was in leather pants and a band t-shirt and dark eyeliner and looked like she was going to blow a gasket.

They had saved her from an oncoming werewolf and somehow, she knew all about them. And then she explained about this show called Supernatural and a man called Eric Kripke and they were just very confused.

"OMD! You guys are adorkable! I love it!" she spewed, jumping from foot to foot. She really did look about to burst.

"We're what?" Dean asked.

"OMD! You guys are CHEPIC!"

Dean stared in confusion as Sam looked a little uneasy. "Are you a fangirl?" his brother asked.

She almost passed out. "YES! OMD! YES! Muse! Muse-"

"Yeah, ok whatever, can you go now?" Dean said irritated and not at all in the mood to hear her full name.

Her face dropped, "Well… I, I guess."

Sam felt sympathy. "What exactly do you know about…us?"

Her face brightened and Dean groaned. "Well, you're brothers…!" She squealed and Sam made a face. "Sorry about the squeeing. And you travel with Dean's angel, Cas and-"

"Hold on," Dean interrupted, "MY angel?"

She made a face that said it was obvious. "Um, yeah. Duh. Castiel barely even interacts with Sam. Everyone knows that he's only around because of you Dean. Everyone knows he secretly loves you but won't tell you because he knows you well enough to know that you're not gay and won't reciprocate those feelings. Even Sam."

Dean froze, surprised. He looked to Sam who looked a little guilty and shrugged. "She's not wrong, you know," the younger Winchester said. He gave Dean his endearing look. Then:

"OMD! Puppydog Eyes!"

Sam scrunched up his face. "What?" he said, looking to Muse.

"OMD! Bitchface!"

She was freaking ecstatic, but Dean didn't care. What did she mean about Cas?

"Um, hey, freak-out-chick, what do you-?"

"Muse," she corrected lightly.

He sighed. Mind as well humor her. "Muse, what do you mean about Cas?"

"Well its obvious- OMD! HOT WINGS!"

Dean and Sam turned around to see Castiel standing there with a weird look on his face, his head tilted to the side. "Dean, what is-"

"HEAD TILT! HOLY CACA!" Muse was red now, almost falling over herself to get to Castiel. "I'm Muse. I know you're Castiel, Angel of the Lord, angel of Thursday! HI! I'm a huge fan, HUGE fan!"

Castiel looked to Sam and Dean and was completely and utterly lost. What the hell? "Um… I don't know-"

"GAH! YOU'RE SO….HOT!" She was practically drooling.

Dean actually got a little possessive after that one. "Ok. Back off. Give him some space. Although he doesn't get the whole 'personal space' thing, I have reason to believe you do."

She stepped back reluctantly, as Castiel whispered, "Thank you Dean, she was beginning to-"

"OMD!" Dean sighed and turned to see her staring at him and Cas. What the hell?

"They're eye-fucking," she whispered to Sam, but Dean could still hear.

"We're what?"

"Ooops. Anyway-oh look! He's turning so red, his frackles are like, gone!"

"His… frackles?" Castiel asked. He turned to Dean. "What are frackles?"

He shook his head mystified. He had no clue.

"So have you guys got it on yet?" she asked curiously, as Sam laughed in the corner.

Castiel did the 'head tilt' again and said, "Got what on?" as Dean blushed furiously.

She whistled. "So that's a no. Tell me Cas, why haven't you told him yet?"

"Told whom what?"

She whispered something in his ear and then backed away, hands folded in front of her, her eyes bright. "Well?"

Castiel looked like he had a thunder cloud over his head as he said, "I do not know how you know of that, or why you know of that. But o not bring it up with him."

"Already did, angel."

Castiel looked horrified. "OMD!" she exclaimed. "He's adorkable when he's all nervous, yeah?"

Sam shook his head. "What the HELL does OMD stand for?"

"Oh my Destiel," she stated plainly, watching Dean and Castiel stare at each other. "Epic stare-off," she sighed in happiness.

"What's Destiel?" Sam then asked.

She sighed. "Destiel is a mix of Dean and Castiel. Like Wincest," she gagged now, "But a lot more probable and actually REAL. Wincest sucks. Anyway. Destiel. Dean/Castiel. It equals Destiel. It's very widely supported by me, people all over the world and other family members of mine. Which are probably looking for me, but, whatever. Its Destiel. My OTP. One true pairing," she clarified at his look. She stopped then, took a breath from her long speech as if to go on and then said shortly, "In conclusion: cock."

Sam stood frozen for a moment and then burst out laughing.

Castiel and Dean were now talking though, voices hushed and slightly raising at certain words. The angel looked anguished and Dean looked angry.

Suddenly, someone yelled, "MUSE!" Dean and Cas were too busy arguing to notice, but Sam and Muse did.

"Here come the cavalry," she murmured.

In walked a man that looked a little older than her in tight jeans and a leather vest over a gray sweater. His hair went to his shoulders and he looked slightly relieved. Next to him was another man, younger, about Muse's age and he looked very similar to her. He was in regular jeans and a jacket.

"Where the hell have you been?" they asked in unison.

She smiled. "Boys, Sam Winchester. Sam Winchester, meet Damon and Henry. My older brother and twin."

The two men swiveled to look at him and gaped. Then they looked to Cas and Dean who were started to get a little rowdy and their jaws dropped. "No way…" the older one murmured.

"Uh…" Sam shook his head. What the hell?

"Are you real?" the one named Henry asked. Sam nodded. "Sweet."

"Can… can I hug you?" Damon then asked.

Muse brightened. "Hell, good thought, Dame. I wanna hug too!"

Sam was suddenly squished to death by Damon and Muse. He stood there, too shocked to do anything else until Henry pulled them off. "Damn it guys, don't suffocate him."

Sam was eternally grateful that the trio had a sensible head. Kind of like him in his team of idiots… Speaking of which, they were awfully quiet.

Muse was too, come to think of it and her older brother. And Henry's face was slightly… pleased? What? Sam then noticed they were all looking behind him, in Cas and Dean's direction…

He turned and wished he hadn't. Sure he had known it would happen sometime, but…Wow.

Dean and Castiel were attached at the face by their lips. Honest to God kissing. And they both seemed to be participating. Muse looked like she was on cloud nine and was going to pass out, muttering, "I feel like I've just been Kripked," while Damon couldn't stop smiling and taking pictures, murmuring how HOT that was and making Sam think he wasn't entirely straight and Henry was just shaking his head saying it was about time and Sam had to agree.

But when it started getting heated and Muse had already pulled out her phone and had gotten a few minutes of footage on it already, Sam thought it was best to get the younger people out of there.

"Um…. Let's go, shall we?"

"WHAT!" Muse exclaimed, horrified. "It's getting good though!"

Damon nodded, exuberant and Henry said, "Guys, none of us are old enough to watch porn. I suggest we all skedaddle."

Sam saw that the other two weren't moving so he pulled out his next weapon. "We'll all go to a dinner in the Impala and get some pie," he suggested.

That got them. "THE METALLICAR!" Damon exclaimed.

"THE METALLICAR AND PIE!" Muse said louder, running to said vehicle salivating. Whether it was for the car or pie, or even both, Sam didn't know.

As Damon ran after her, Henry murmured, "It's both, if you're wondering. And I only know because I'm her twin and better half."

And Sam had to agree.

As they walked over, he heard Muse mutter, "And then, they had sex!" as she sat in the front passenger's seat.

Damon nodded and then asked, "M-preg?"

She shook her head. "Maybe Egg-preg or ass babies. I don't know which theory is accurate! But its exciting!"

Henry just made a face.

In all, as they sat at the dinner, Muse scoffing down pie faster than even Dean would have or ever had, Sam thought that this was the weirdest night he had ever had. He'd saved a girl who somehow knew all about them, found out that an angel digged his brother, had said rescued teen's older brother and twin pop up, found that they all supported the whole 'Destiel' deal, had said angel and brother make out simultaneously in front of them and then had to bribe said teens with the Impala (what the hell was a Metallicar?) and pie to get them out of there before things got too freaky.

Yeah, a_ weird_ night.

Understatement of the century.

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**Crack. I am aware.**

**Any thoughts?**


End file.
